The Hypothetical Copulation Reductions
by Angelic Guardian
Summary: "If we were in a physical relationship, you just lost sex tonight."
1. Tension

**Author's Note:** This fic was inspired by Sheldon's line in The Proton Transmogrification.

**Disclaimer:** The Big Bang Theory © Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady

* * *

The battle began with a seemingly meaningless comment from Sheldon, one that ended up hitting Amy so hard she frankly couldn't allow him to get away with saying it without some much-needed repercussions. There were many instances in which Sheldon would say something that would offend Amy, but she'd let it fly under the radar simply because she knew that, deep down, he didn't mean it.

But now, after putting up with it time and again, this one comment managed to send her over the edge, stripping her away of her patience and leaving her with only one goal in mind. She was going to force-feed Sheldon a large spoonful of his cold and bitter-tasting medicine, and he was going to swallow it and see, once and for all, just how much _he _liked it.

"Are you sure you don't want to go say goodbye?" Amy asked, sitting next to Sheldon on her couch.

He'd been watching old videos of the late Professor Proton, and thus far, he seemed to be taking the news about the death of his beloved childhood idol surprisingly well.

"Amy," Sheldon said, turning to her, "mourning the inevitable is a complete waste of time."

Amy stared at him for a moment, unable to truly see any logic in that statement, and it only brought her to ask, "And watching a bunch of goofy space movies you've seen hundreds of times isn't?"

His blue eyes swiftly looked her up and down, before he bluntly—and callously—replied, "If we were in a physical relationship, you just lost sex tonight."

The words hit her like a blast of cold air, smacking her right in the face and leaving her wide-eyed and stinging. Sheldon promptly turned away and took a sip of the tea she'd handed him, while she stared at him, her mouth hanging open. _Did those words really just come out of his mouth?_

Sheldon, meanwhile, simply opened another video, completely clueless of the emotional torrent hitting Amy that ranged from utter shock, to blatant confusion, until a sudden and powerful feeling of anger ultimately swept up within her. It was a blind, consuming fury, swelling in a rush of heat throughout her entire body, flooding her mind with a brilliantly wicked idea.

_Well, _she thought, a devious smile teasing at the corners of her lips, _two could certainly play at that game._

* * *

It took Amy a few months to finally strike, but when she did, she made sure to hit him hard and unexpectedly, taking it one step further by doing it in front of all their friends. The look on his face alone had made the unintentionally long wait all the more worth it.

The whole gang was sitting around Sheldon and Leonard's apartment. Empty pizza boxes littered the coffee table as everyone enjoyed their last few slices while chatting about what they'd each been up to at work.

Amy emerged from the bathroom, crossing to the living room and taking her seat in the middle of the couch, with Sheldon in his spot, as always, and Bernadette on the other side. Amy picked up her empty plate with one hand and reached for the empty pizza box with the other.

"Is there any pizza left?" she asked to no one in particular, lifting the lid and peeking inside to find that the box was empty.

"No, sorry, sweetie. Sheldon got the last slice," Penny said, sitting in the dark wooden chair next to Leonard, who sat in the armchair.

Amy looked at Sheldon, who had the half-eaten slice raised to his mouth. He paused, lowering it to his plate.

"I wasn't aware that you wanted another slice," he said. "You typically eat two slices when we order pizza."

He was right about that, and, in all honesty, she wasn't even hungry enough to have another slice. Yet, in that moment, as he picked up his slice and took a bite, chewing quietly, the wheels in Amy's head began turning, cranking to life with a spark. She realized that this was a golden opportunity, with everyone sitting here on a casual evening, a perfect chance to get back at him for what he'd said.

And so, with a straight face, Amy dropped her empty plate and said, with the most casual, deadpan tone she could muster, "I'm sorry, Sheldon, but I cannot allow your inconsiderate behavior to go unpunished. I'm afraid you've just lost sex tonight."

Several things happened all at once.

Penny spat out her drink, spraying Leonard's ear with a mist of water, while Raj choked on the mouthful he'd been eating and started coughing profusely. Howard's jaw dropped, and Bernadette screeched out a piercing, _"What?" _that caused Amy to cringe. However, as she looked at her boyfriend to gauge his reaction, she found herself holding back a wide, cocky smirk.

Sheldon had stiffened and dropped his slice of pizza, though his hand stayed suspended in front of his mouth. _"Excuse_ me?" he asked, slightly breathless.

Amy bit her bottom lip, her heart twisting wildly. Feeling a bit bolder, she leaned in, as if to whisper to him, though she purposely kept her voice loud enough for everyone to hear as she said, "If we were in a physical relationship, you just lost sex tonight."

She leaned back against the couch, keeping her gaze solely on Sheldon, whose skin now looked a lot paler, as if that were even possible. She heard everyone talking around her, trying to get answers, one speaking after the next:

"Wait, so you guys still aren't _actually_ having sex?" Howard asked.

"I can't believe you almost gave me a heart attack over nothing!" Raj said.

"I totally knew Amy was only kidding," Bernadette said.

"Yeah, me too. Totally knew that," Penny said.

"Then why'd you give my ear a _shower?"_ Leonard asked.

During all of this, Sheldon and Amy were staring at one another, and Amy couldn't help but notice the way his chest moved at a quickening pace. Finally, that sneaky little smirk she'd been holding back willingly slipped over her face.

_How's that medicine taste, Dr. Cooper?_

* * *

Sheldon didn't truly react until a few hours later, as she'd suspected he would, after everyone else had gone home. Leonard and Penny retired to Penny's apartment, and it wasn't until the two of them were gone that the unusually silent and stoic Sheldon finally snapped out of it.

"Would you like some tea, Sheldon?" Amy asked, deliberately going about their normal routine as though everything were fine.

"You expect me to sit here and drink tea with you after what you said to me?" Sheldon asked.

Amy placed the teakettle on the stove and turned on the burner, smiling. It was starting. He was riled up, while she was perfectly calm, and she was going to stay this way, keeping the upper hand.

"And what did I say, exactly, that upset you, Sheldon?" she asked, taking out the box of tea bags and opening it to peruse the various flavors of tea.

"That I've just lost _sex_ tonight."

Amy paused, looking up at him. He was visibly tense and agitated, breathing a bit hard, eyes heated. For a split-second, her heart twitched with guilt, but, in another flash of a second, it was gone, and she snapped the tea box shut, determined to stay firm.

"If you must know, the reason I said that was to get back at you for saying it to me," she said. "I realize it was juvenile, but I felt that it needed to be done. Now you and I are even."

_"Even?"_ Sheldon asked, clearly not the least bit soothed by her reasoning. If anything, he seemed to be even _more _worked up as he continued, "I fail to see why you felt the need to get back at me for a comment I made _months_ ago, one that I only made to discourage you from insulting those 'goofy space movies' which happen to be loved by millions."

"And my intention for tonight was to discourage your selfish behavior from resurfacing in the future," Amy said. "There's nothing wrong with a little negative reinforcement."

Sheldon opened his mouth to respond, but he hesitated, and Amy knew she was winning this battle. His voice grew loud and harsh as he said, "Well, at least _I_ had the decency to say it when we were alone, and not in front of our ruthless friends who clearly can't wait for the day when you and I finally—_have sex."_

He practically choked on the words, and Amy's eyebrows shot up at this. Sex was obviously an uncomfortable topic for him, and seeing him so flustered and embarrassed like this made her feel another twinge of guilt. Her hardened exterior softened with sympathy, forcing her to relent at last.

"Well," she said, "the point I was trying to make is that it's not okay to withhold sex as a means of punishment, even if it is only hypothetical. Do you understand, Sheldon?"

Sheldon stared at her, silent and subdued. "Oh, believe me, I understand, Dr. Fowler," he said, voice dipping low and gaze penetrating.

"Good," she replied in a steady voice, despite the tiny prickling in her spine. _Did it just get__ hotter in here?_

They stared at each other for a while. Even when the whistling from the teapot eventually pierced the silence, they still didn't break eye contact. Amy reached behind her, turning off the burner, while a hint of a smirk played across Sheldon's lips. In the back of her mind, she couldn't help but think, _This isn't over, is it?_

* * *

She'd gradually forgotten all about the battle, as she believed that Sheldon truly had learned his lesson, which she later realized was her own foolish mistake. After all, he was Sheldon Cooper. He didn't learn lessons. He also didn't play to _get even_. He played to _win._

What _he_ didn't realize, however, was that Amy wasn't willing to let him win so easily. The sting of hurt she felt when he put those words back into play managed to awaken her vengeful side all over again, and frankly, if it was a battle he wanted, it was a battle he'd gladly get.

"Sorry I'm late, Sheldon," Amy said as Sheldon slid into the passenger's seat of her car. "I got held up at work."

Sheldon closed the car door and fastened his seat belt without a word, his demeanor icy, which worried Amy. When he finally did speak, his tone was clipped.

"It's fine," he said, which only stirred up the uneasy feeling brewing within her.

"Are you sure?" she asked. "I know how important punctuality is to you."

"It's extremely important to me," Sheldon said. "However, I realize that it was unfair to put you at an inconvenience by asking you to drive me home on such short notice when it's supposed to be Leonard's responsibility. I'm obviously well aware that your career is a top priority that requires an ample amount of your time, thus making it perfectly understandable that you were eleven minutes late picking me up."

Amy was silent, pleasantly surprised by how rational he was being despite the fact that he hadn't gotten his way.

"Thank you, Sheldon," she said.

"You're welcome," he said.

They were silent for the rest of the car ride, until Amy pulled up in front of Sheldon's apartment building. He unbuckled his seat belt and opened the car door, only to pause, turning to her.

"Amy?" he said softly.

"Yes?" she asked.

His eyes searched her, and Amy shivered. It was a strangely intimate moment, as their faces were really close, and there was something warm and tender in the look in his eyes.

That is, until he opened his mouth and said, in another viciously cold slap, "You've just lost sex tonight."

Amy's face dropped. "What? You just said you understood why I was late."

"Oh, I understand it. That doesn't mean I'm pleased with it," Sheldon said. He stepped out of the car, speaking in that arrogant tone of his that she loathed so intensely. "Thus, hypothetically, no sex for you tonight, little lady. Thank you for the ride. Goodnight."

He slammed the car door shut and walked away, and as Amy watched his retreating back, she narrowed her eyes and clenched her grip on the steering wheel.

_Oh, this is definitely not over, you jerk._

* * *

She didn't wait too long to make her move this time.

In fact, she did it that same night, just minutes after dropping Sheldon off. She'd parked her car and climbed the stairs, and now, she was pounding relentlessly on his door. When Sheldon finally opened it, they both froze. He stared at her in bewilderment for a second, and she stared back, gaze serious, before the moment shattered. He smirked in a way that was so pompous it had Amy wishing she could smack it right off of his face.

"I presume you've come here to beg me to change my mind about not engaging in hypothetical coitus with you tonight," Sheldon said.

Amy brought up her arms and delicately folded them over her chest, delivering a simple and resolute, "No."

Sheldon wrinkled his eyebrows, his smirk disappearing, his hand slipping from the doorknob as he feebly repeated, "No?"

"That's right," Amy said. "I'm here because you were not only rude to me, but clearly insincere when you thanked me for giving you a ride home tonight, even though I did you a favor out of sheer kindness. I wholeheartedly refuse to let you get away with being so ungrateful and condescending to me. So, you take away sex tonight, well, guess what, buddy? You've just lost sex _tomorrow_ night."

Sheldon didn't move, though his eyes widened, and all Amy could do was smirk now, as she knew she'd just obtained another win, and, oh, was it satisfying.

"But, tomorrow night is date night," he said.

"It certainly is, isn't it?" Amy said cheekily. "Goodnight, Sheldon."

Feeling particularly audacious, she gave him a saucy wink, her face bright and smiling. She turned on her heels, heading down the staircase without looking back, the delightful tingle of victory swimming through her veins.

_Suck it, boyfriend._

* * *

Unfortunately, the battle only escalated from there.

In fact, Amy hadn't even made it out of the apartment building when she received a text from Sheldon that brought her to a dead halt just as she was pushing open the lobby door.

_For your unnecessary and irrational outburst in the hallway, you've just lost sex the following night._

She let her hand slip from the door as she stared at the text for a while. This was getting out of hand, but at the same time, she absolutely refused to back down and let him win, and so, she sent her response:

_In that case, for failing to apologize to me, you've just lost sex the night after that._

As she was getting into her car, she received yet another text from Sheldon:

_ Fine. For being stubborn and petulant, you've just lost sex the night after THAT. I sincerely hope you know what you're doing, __ Dr. Fowler, __because I can, and will, do this all night if I have to._

Thus, Amy swiftly replied, in a blunt challenge:

_Game on, Dr. Cooper._

* * *

By the time that conversation came to an end, Sheldon and Amy had reached a point where they—hypothetically—wouldn't be having coitus for the next three weeks.

Not that Sheldon _cared._

Why would he care? It was all hypothetical. It didn't _matter._ It was the principle of the matter that mattered. It certainly didn't bother him in the least that each time he fired off a reason why Amy had just lost sex, she fired one right back at him within seconds, as if she had the reasons stored like an arsenal of weapons in her mind: _You're childish. _Bang. No sex. _You're inconsiderate. _Pow. No sex. _Y__ou're vindictive. _Boom. _No sex._

He didn't care, he didn't care, _he didn't care!_

"Cooper, how's it hangin'?"

Sheldon jumped in his office chair and jerked his head up after having it buried in his hands. The unwelcome presence of one of his longtime nemeses immediately had him grimacing and wanting to throw his head back into his hands, but instead he simply heaved a frustrated sigh as he pushed back his chair and got up, walking over to his whiteboard.

"What do you want from me, Kripke?" he asked, picking up a random marker and tugging off the cap so hard that he nearly hit himself in the face as his hand flew back from the pressure.

"Whoa, sounds like somebody swallowed one too many bitch pills this morning," Kripke said, folding his arms over his chest as he sauntered into Sheldon's office, a wry smile slithering across his face. "What's the matter, Cooper, your girlfriend didn't put out last night?"

Sheldon's eyes shot open wide as he whipped around to face Kripke, whose smirk only broadened. The look of surprise on Sheldon's face scrunched up into an irritable scowl.

"Would you please be respectful and not use such vulgar language when talking about my girlfriend?" he asked. Suddenly, though, his hardened gaze faltered, and his voice grew timid as he confessed, "But, if you must know, yes."

"Ha! I knew it. You totally reek of sexual frustration," Kripke said. "Well, listen, if your woman is refusing to give up the good stuff, you could always…"

He let the sentence trail off as he rapidly shook his fist and threw open his palm. Sheldon blinked, staring at him, entirely lost.

"Throw dice?" he asked after a beat of silence.

Kripke erupted with a burst of laughter. "You're pulling my leg, man! Later, weirdo."

On that note, he left the way he came, and Sheldon, more confused than ever, stood there, unmoving, until his eyes dropped to his hands, one holding the marker, the other the cap. Slowly, he capped the marker and placed it down, before cupping his hand into a loose fist. He moved his fist up and down with nowhere near as much speed as Kripke had used. After doing this several times, he opened his palm, staring at his spread fingers, as if waiting for something to happen.

When nothing did, he grew annoyed all over again and called out, "That didn't help at all!"

* * *

The air was thick with tension.

Sheldon and Amy ate quietly, hardly acknowledging one another. There was the occasional scratching of silverware and a glance up every now and then to see if the other was paying any attention. This went on for a while without either of them ever catching each other's gaze.

Truthfully, Amy had been a bit surprised when Sheldon showed up to her apartment for their date tonight. That text conversation from hell had lasted much longer than she ever thought it would. He'd said cruel things, she'd said cruel things, and in the end, he still hadn't apologized. It was all she wanted, all she needed, though apparently, an apology was too much to ask of the high and mighty Sheldon Cooper.

As Amy set down her fork and picked up her glass of water, she once again looked up at Sheldon from across the table. His eyes were on his plate as he chewed slowly, mechanically, while she kept the cool glass of water to her lips, swallowing the refreshing liquid. Growing impatient, she placed her glass down and picked up her fork, forcefully stabbing a cherry tomato on her plate.

"Do you really think I'm condescending?"

Amy stopped, caught off guard by Sheldon's question, partly because it was the first thing either of them had said since greeting one another and sitting down to dinner, and partly because of the question itself. His eyes were serious, a strange heaviness to them, as though holding back pain. She'd said he was condescending as one of the many reasons for taking away sex from him, but had she really hurt his feelings?

"Honestly, yes," she said, setting her fork down. "You always have to be right and you know it."

More silence, though it was brief this time, as Sheldon spoke again.

"And, do you really think I'm unsympathetic towards anyone's feelings but my own?"

"I think you can be extremely selfish at times, yes," Amy said. "Especially when it comes to our relationship. It makes me feel like you think I'm inferior to you."

"I don't think that at all," Sheldon said, so plainly and sincerely that it had Amy reeling in surprise.

"You don't?" she asked.

"No," Sheldon said. "I think of you as my equal, which you are. I'm continuously discovering new things that you and I have in common. Just look at this ridiculous competition between us. You clearly hate losing just as much as I do."

"That's true," Amy said, and she smiled in spite of herself. There was a noticeable shift in the mood, the tension thinning out, making the atmosphere light and airy around them, prompting Amy to admit something else. "You know, Sheldon, I was thinking about that competition, and I've realized that in trying to teach you a lesson about hurting my feelings, I only wound up making matters worse by making it all about sex."

Sheldon stared at her for a moment, and his words sounded deliberate and careful as he asked, "Are you suggesting that by hypothetically withholding sex instead of discussing what's truly bothering us, it only hurt the situation and, in fact, ourselves, by denying us the sexual gratification we're both secretly craving?"

Amy found herself holding her breath. _Is the air getting thinner in here?_

"You mean, _hypothetically_ craving, right?"

"Right," Sheldon said immediately. "Hypothetically."

"Right," Amy said, though her head was suddenly feeling a lot lighter, and her lips ticked up again as she repeated, "Hypothetically."

There was a noticeably long pause that somehow had a meaningful weight to it, when finally, Sheldon returned to eating his dinner. Amy tried to do the same, but she found it difficult to concentrate on her meal, as she was too distracted by her thickening pulse and the warmth quivering in her body.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry," Sheldon said.

Amy dropped her fork with a loud clang. _Did _those_ words really just come out of his mouth?_

"You are?" she asked.

"I am," Sheldon said. "I've realized that I can be inconsiderate to you at times, even if it is unintentional. Regardless, I'll make it my personal duty to start treating you better by taking your needs into consideration when making any and all decisions that could potentially affect our relationship."

All Amy could do was stare at him, trying to find a sign of insincerity in his words, in his demeanor, but she couldn't find a single one.

"Thank you, Sheldon," she said at last. "That means a lot to me. Really."

He nodded, and with that, they resumed eating. The silence promptly renewed itself, but it was much more comfortable now, the way it usually felt between them.

"I'm sorry, too," Amy said before she could lose her nerve. "I never meant to offend you or hurt your feelings. I hope you'll forgive me."

"I do forgive you," Sheldon said with ease, and again Amy was struck with surprise. He was behaving so _maturely. _It was almost as if…

"Sheldon," Amy said with new found wariness, "are you…only saying these things because you…hypothetically…want to have sex tonight?"

Now Sheldon dropped his fork.

"What? No," he said defensively, and there was a nervous tone to his voice that she swore she'd never heard before as he proceeded to deny her allegation. "Absolutely not. How dare you say that. I don't just apologize for the sake of apologizing. I'm apologizing because I'm sincerely regretful for not treating you as well as I should. I'm certainly not trying to get you to drop this whole argument so that we can release our physical frustrations by crawling into bed with one another and having coitus—_hypothetically. _What kind of man do you think I am, Amy?"

Amy's limbs felt like jelly. _What is happening? _

"Okay," she said, her breath straying from her yet again. She was thankful that she was sitting down, because she felt like her knees were about to give out. "Sorry."

"Apology accepted," Sheldon said.

With the tranquility permanently derailed, they finished eating their dinner without another word. The tension was back and heavier than ever, and now, in addition to it, there was a zealous and underlying heat radiating in Amy's loins, a sensation that, unbeknownst to her, Sheldon was feeling as well.

* * *

The dishes were in the sink, the table was clean, and Sheldon was getting ready to leave.

"Dinner was delicious, Amy. Thank you," he said, slinging his messenger bag over his shoulder.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it," Amy said. She was absently wiping the kitchen counter with a dish towel, circling the same spot over, and over, and over, until she noticed that Sheldon was staring at her by the doorway, and she stopped, realizing what he was waiting for.

_Oh, right, _she thought. _Of course._

Abandoning the dish towel, she walked towards him, her limbs feeling like lead now, heavy and impenetrable. When she finally reached him, she sucked in a breath, somehow unprepared as he swept down and kissed her with a force so powerful that she reacted on impulse and threw up her arms, winding them around the back of his head, fingers entwining in his hair. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her against him. It was deep and intense and passionate, and then, as abruptly as it started, it was over. He drew back, a loud breath escaping him as he opened his eyes and stared at her with wildly dilated pupils.

Amy, flushed, stared up at him, breathing out just as hard as she said, "You know what? I change my mind. I think we would be having sex tonight. Hypothetically."

"Oh," Sheldon panted. "Good. I'm glad. Goodnight, Amy."

Another lingering, deep look between them, and finally, he released her, leaving quickly.

After the door closed behind him, Amy stood there for quite a while, listening to her own harsh breaths that echoed in her ears. She put a hand to her mouth, cupping it gently, as though trying to savor the tingling warmth left over from Sheldon's lips moving ravenously against her own.

Suddenly, she dropped her hand and found her feet taking her to her bathroom. She didn't think about what she was doing, because if she paused to think about it, she knew she'd back down, and right now, her body was giving her all the signs of what it needed, and she couldn't ignore it. She was newly energized, and she needed to find release.

After flicking on the light switch and closing the door, she had enough sense left over to lock it as well. A fleeting glance in the mirror allowed her to see that she looked as aroused as she felt. Her pupils were big and her cheeks were pink, and the sight of herself only made her breathe out harder.

She pulled open the drawer beneath the sink, hastily rummaging through the contents. When she found what she was looking for, she stiffened, and she swore that her rapid heartbeat had frozen for a split-second.

Fingers trembling slightly, she touched it, the familiar cool sleekness, and she exhaled shakily as she wrapped her hand around it and pulled it out, admiring the modest, but effective, object. She pressed the button on the side with her thumb. It started to vibrate in her hand, the soft buzzing filling the air, and an impish smile spread across her heated face.

"Hello, Gerard, my old friend."

* * *

**Author's Note:** ;)


	2. Infatuation

**Author's Note:** So, this fic was just supposed to be a oneshot, but based on multiple requests to continue it, I've decided to oblige, so it will now be a three-parter. Enjoy. ;)

* * *

Sheldon didn't sleep well that night.

In fact, he hardly slept at all, as he couldn't stop thinking about what Amy had said, that they would be having sex tonight—_hypothetically_. That word was starting to irritate Sheldon to no end, though he wasn't exactly sure why, and the more he pondered it, the more annoyed he'd become.

He'd promptly abandoned that train of thought and instead found himself thinking about the kiss at the end of their date night. He'd been acting entirely out of physical desire, as his body had been wound up that entire evening over dinner, radiating with heat in a way he'd never felt before. The tension had alleviated greatly when he finally kissed Amy, although, when she'd thrown her arms around him and tangled her fingers in his hair, he'd felt something else awaken—an unmistakable twitch in his nether region, a subsequent rush of blood flowing throughout his body—and he knew he had to get out of there before things escalated.

Unfortunately, though, the tension he felt that evening hadn't fully gone away. In fact, it stayed dormant in his body, all night, as he slept uneasily, until he awoke the next morning with a big problem.

A big, _hard _problem.

His eyes popped open, startling him wide awake, when he felt it that morning. It was a number of sensations—the straining against his waistband, the pulsing between his thighs—and when he slowly peeled away the blankets to survey the situation, his eyes only widened even more, and his face grew incredibly hot.

_Oh, sweet Jesus. _

His first thought was to simply not move at all and allow things to calm down naturally. He forced his eyes shut again as he tried to think of something else, _anything _else, something mundane that could not be twisted into anything even remotely sexual—the weather, the warm sunshine. Yes, that was a good start. What else? Trains! His favorite. The engine, the tracks. The train trip he'd taken over the summer.

The train trip on Valentine's Day.

When he'd first kissed Amy.

_No. No. __Dangerous territory._

His eyes snapped open again, his breathing becoming shorter, more shallow. He was throbbing so hard now, it was downright _painful._

_Oh no._

With a gulp, he reached down, only for his hand to freeze, hovering just above the…_problem_ area.

_No. I can't do this. __I'm above this. __I refuse to give in to physical temptation.  
_

Resolutely, he took the comforter in his hands and pulled it back over his body, but, as he did, he felt the friction from the blanket as it accidentally grazed his tip, and immediately his legs clenched and his heart jumped. Acting on sheer adrenaline, he flung the blankets off his body and got up.

_Okay. At least…I can't do this here._

Padding barefoot out of his bedroom, he paused and glanced down the hallway to check to see if Leonard's bedroom door was still closed. When he saw that it was, he released a sigh of relief, and finally, he walked into the bathroom.

He closed the door behind him and locked it, the soft click sounding much louder to him than usual. As he turned from the door, his eyes caught sight of himself in the mirror above the sink, and he froze, stunned by the appearance of his own brightly flushed face. Swallowing, he walked up to the sink, grasping either side of it. He stared at himself for a while, trying to focus on his breathing, parting his lips as he exhaled softly, inhaled slowly, and exhaled again.

His eyes eventually dropped from the mirror as he turned on the sink. He cupped both of his hands beneath the faucet, palms filling with cold water that instantly numbed his fingers, and he splashed it over his face, letting it trickle down his heated cheeks. When that wasn't enough, he placed one of his wrists beneath the running water, hoping that by dowsing one of the cooling points of his body, his temperature would start to diminish.

After switching to his other wrist, letting the cold water rush over his pale skin for several seconds, his body still felt warm, so he placed his cold, dripping hand over the back of his neck, rubbing it lightly. This was no use. He was beginning to realize that he only had two options here: Continue distracting himself by trying to cool down his body and ignore the persistent aching between his thighs that insistently demanded his attention, or…

He swallowed again, heart pounding wildly, nearly matching the tempo of the dull pulsing in his groin. With his gaze transfixed on his reflection in the mirror, he reached for the tie of his robe. He pulled on it slowly, his breath quickening yet again, as his tongue darted out, licking the corner of his top lip. It slipped back into his mouth as he pulled open his robe and shrugged out of it, letting it slide off his shoulders and onto the filthy floor, of all places, and yet, he made no move to pick it up. He was no longer thinking logically, as his hindbrain was in full control now, guiding his every move.

He turned off the sink next and walked over to the shower, throwing open the plastic curtain and turning on the water. In an instant, his hands were back to his body, at his chest now, unbuttoning his cotton pajama shirt and stripping off his white undershirt. He carelessly threw both articles of clothing behind him, and, with his chest exposed, he shivered, listening as the water poured down in the shower._  
_

He exhaled, hard and shakily, as he untied his pajama pants and pushed them down his long, pale legs. He stepped out of them, wearing only his underwear now. Without daring to look down at himself, he hooked his thumbs into the elastic waistband of his briefs and, curling his fingers over the soft material, pulled them down as well. He shuddered again as his member, stiff and red, became exposed to the air. He waited a few seconds, knowing that this was his last chance to back down. Here he was, completely naked, his body pounding, and all that stood in the way of his much-needed physical gratification was his own willpower, his own humility. With a deep breath, he came to his decision, and he finally stepped into the shower, snapping the curtain shut.

As the warm water cascaded over his body, he found that it hardly soothed him at all, and in fact, his breathing only grew shorter, to the point where he was already panting. He felt as though he were about to pass out with how lightheaded he felt, but he forced himself to concentrate, and so, closing his eyes, he reached down, laying his palm over his hardened shaft. He was so overcome by the sensitivity from this contact alone that his hips jerked and his knees locked, but he didn't let go, and instead, he fully grasped himself, letting out a hiss of air as he curved his fingers around the base of his length.

For a moment, he simply stood beneath the shower head, motionless, holding his member in his hand. His eyes were still closed tight, but he finally opened them with a few fluttering blinks, his tongue involuntarily sweeping over his lips once more. There was no going back now.

_Here we go. Slow and steady._

His heart pumping erratically, he moved his hand at last, giving himself a long, careful stroke. The pleasure was instant, pooling in the pit of his stomach, filling him with a warmth so powerful that the initial mortification he'd felt was already melting away, leaving him to only focus on the sensations. As he reached the tip, he let his thumb swipe over the head, sensitive and hot, before his hand slid back down his length in the same languid motion.

He did this a few times, moving slowly up, and slowly back down, but he found that the pleasure, overwhelming at first, was beginning to dwindle. It was no longer enough, and so, he started stroking himself a bit faster, adding just a little more pressure. His breathing grew louder as he slid his hand up and down, fully pumping now. His mind and his body were at odds, the former begging him to stop, and the latter to continue. For the first time in his life, his mind was losing, being overpowered, and it absolutely terrified him, because he couldn't stop.

_"Amy,"_ he moaned, a throaty whisper, as he gripped himself even harder, the heat rising within him. He could feel himself perspiring, his breathing the only sound in his ears, despite the running water.

As he increased his speed, he still wanted more, so he reached down with his left hand and cupped his testicles, squeezing them softly, while his fingers tightened around his erection. He was getting close, feeling hotter and dizzier by the second. He abruptly stepped back from the water, as the steam was suffocating him, and he could hardly breathe as it was.

"Amy," he gasped again, and suddenly his left hand flew up, grasping for something, _anything. _His palm pressed flat against the cool tiles of the shower wall, his right hand still pumping away. His feet spread apart wider, toes curling tightly as his eyes slipped shut again, and the moment they did, he thought of Amy, the feeling of her soft lips, her fingers gliding through his hair, her body pressing against him_, _and he imagined her voice, whispering his name, her breath hot in his ear.

_"Sheldon."_

With a shudder so powerful it rippled throughout his entire body, he exploded, and he kept pumping as he rode the waves of his orgasm, a feeling of sheer and utter ecstasy, a blinding pleasure.

When it was all over, he was left flushed and breathless. He slumped against the shower tiles, panting loudly, and he released his grip at last, waiting for his body to fully calm down. He stood there for a long time, simply breathing in and out, until there was a knock at the door that had him standing bolt upright, and he heard Leonard's voice.

"Sheldon?"

The panic Sheldon felt in that moment swallowed him whole, snapping him right out of his post-orgasm state of bliss.

"Yes," he said, his voice loud, but unsteady. He took a second to forcefully clear his throat. "I'll be out in a moment."

The panicked feeling only hit him harder, like a wave crashing in the ocean, as he realized that he didn't have any time to actually bathe himself. The longer he stayed in here, the more suspicious Leonard would undoubtedly become.

Shutting off the water, he immediately shivered, water trickling down his body, hair dripping. He stepped out of the shower and hastily dressed back into his already worn pajamas and bathrobe, ignoring the downright horrifying thought of all the germs and dead skin cells he was coming into contact with.

As calmly as he could, he approached the door, taking one last deep breath, before unlocking and opening it. He was met with a befuddled roommate, his eyebrows tightly knit together, but Sheldon wasn't going to let it faze him.

"Good morning," he said plainly.

"Uh, good morning," Leonard said with far less conviction. "You realize you've cut into my morning bathroom time, right?"

Sheldon's heart beat faster, though he was conscious to remain completely stone-faced.

"Of course I'm aware," he said after a noticeable pause. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get dressed for work."

Before he could even attempt to leave, however, Leonard held up a hand. "Hold on. You're not getting away that easily."

Another jump in his chest, and this time, Sheldon blinked several times, struggling to keep a blank expression. His body was betraying him, and it took all his willpower not to duck away and flee to the safe haven of his own bedroom. He didn't speak, though, in fear of what Leonard was about to say.

As Leonard smirked at him, Sheldon felt like he could die right then and there. _Had he actually…_heard me_ in there? No. No. No._

"You think I'm just going to let you get away with taking a long shower and using up _my _time?" Leonard asked. "If I did that to you, you'd be scolding me like crazy and subtracting every single minute I went over from my bathroom time the following morning. Well, it goes two ways, Sheldon."

Sheldon blinked again, his chest falling with a slow exhale, as the rush of relief he currently felt after drowning in that wave of panic had him feeling as light as air.

"Yes," he said. "You're right. I've committed an infraction to the Roommate Agreement, and it's only fair that I pay the price. I'm willing to deduct ten minutes from my bathroom time tomorrow morning. Is that acceptable?"

Now Leonard blinked, eyebrows furrowing again. "Wow. I'm not used to you being so…agreeable. It took eleven years, but the Roommate Agreement finally worked out in my favor."

"I'm glad you're happy, Leonard," Sheldon said. "Now, if you'll excuse me."

Leonard stared at him a moment longer, before he finally stepped aside, allowing Sheldon to pass. As he headed to his bedroom, a large, relieved, satisfied smile spread across his face.

* * *

Amy woke up that morning feeling refreshed and well-rested.

She had a smile on her face the entire morning as she moved about her apartment, getting ready for work. She felt giddy, like she was floating, as her mind kept pulling her back to last night. Her lips tickled as she recalled their kiss, and her cheeks warmed as she thought about the fun she'd given herself afterward with the help of her trusty electric toothbrush.

In fact, last night's shameless pleasure session had Amy feeling more sexually satisfied and invigorated than she'd felt in a long time. Never in her wildest dreams did she ever think that taking away figurative sex from Sheldon would have led to a such a heated kiss that inflamed her loins the way last night's had.

She just couldn't stop smiling, and she suddenly wondered how Sheldon would react if he ever found out that she pleasured herself to thoughts of him. Would he be surprised? Embarrassed? Repulsed? It would certainly freak him out, she knew that much.

_I wonder if…Sheldon has __ever masturbated?  
_

She blushed furiously at that thought, but it seemed that her mind only wanted to head farther down that road.

_What would that even look like?_

As she envisioned her boyfriend, completely nude and fondling himself, she let out that involuntary, high-pitched noise of arousal that she hadn't made in years, and she clamped a hand over her mouth.

_Okay, Fowler. That's enough, _she scolded. _Time to go to work._

With that, she finally headed out, the sinful smile returning to her face.

* * *

No matter how hard he tried, Sheldon simply could not concentrate on work.

He stared at his white board, equations scribbled all over it, but, for the first time ever, he found that science wasn't enough to hold his attention. His mind, in addition to his body, was betraying him, straying back to Amy, back to this morning, back to the unabashed pleasure he'd given himself in the shower. He shivered, clenching the marker in his hand, only to force himself to relax his grip.

_Hold it together, _he reprimanded. _You're a man of science. Not some sick pervert like_—

"Hello, Cooper."

_Kripke!_

Sheldon purposely didn't say a word. He kept his eyes on his whiteboard as Kripke slithered up to him like the slimy little worm that he was, leaning against the wall.

"So, how'd it go last night?" Kripke asked. "Did your girlfriend put out, or did you…you know?"

With extreme reluctance, Sheldon turned to Kripke, whose face twisted with a grin as he made the same gesture as he did yesterday, pumping his fist a few times. Now, Sheldon's eyes widened, as he actually understood what it meant, and heat rushed to his face so swiftly that he was forced to look away.

"I have absolutely no tolerance for your invasive inquiries," Sheldon said. "My amorous life with my girlfriend is none of your business, and if you have no other intention for being here other than to bombard me with questions about it, I'll kindly ask that you get the hell out of my office."

"Hm," Kripke said, still refusing to budge. "Well, clearly, that means you two _didn't_ screw last night, which could only mean you did the _other_ thing."

Sheldon turned to him again, completely horrified. "I'll have you know that I don't do…_that."_

Kripke only barked out a laugh, but he finally pulled himself from the wall and started heading for the door. "Yeah, sure. Me neither. Hell, I'm sure your girlfriend totally doesn't do it, either. Catch you later, you sick, sick freak."

With that, he left, but the bombshell he'd just dropped immediately exploded, and a string of thoughts ran through Sheldon's mind all at once.

_Amy? Doing…that? What would that even look like?_

He suddenly pictured Amy, in the shower, soaking wet and naked, face flushed and eyes closed, panting hard. His entire body squirmed as blood rushed right to his groin. He staggered backward and bumped into his desk, only to jump back up, his heart hammering as he shook his head violently.

_Oh, dear god. I _am _ a sick pervert!_

* * *

Sheldon couldn't look Amy in the eyes.

He was sitting in his spot, staring directly forward, completely spaced out, and Amy couldn't help feeling worried. He'd been strangely quiet ever since she'd gotten here. The only reason for his bizarre behavior that she could think of was that he was still uncomfortable after the conversation they'd had last night, though she wasn't sure how to go about confronting him about it. She'd tried to simply go about their usual routine, preparing tea, talking about work, in hopes that he'd snap out of it, but Sheldon only seemed to be shutting down.

"The tea is ready, Sheldon," she said, trying once again, in vain, to draw him out of his trance, and when he still wouldn't move, she finally sighed and picked up the mugs of tea, carrying them in each hand. She settled into the beige armchair, placing both mugs down on the glass coffee table. "Sheldon, what's wrong?"

His head snapped to her. It was so abrupt that she jumped in her seat, drawing in a breath so sharply that she knew he'd heard it.

"Amy, there's something I need to tell you," Sheldon said, and now, her stomach jumped as well, an uncomfortable, almost sickly feeling that caused her to swallow hard.

"Okay. What is it?" she asked, suddenly feeling nervous, as she truly had no idea what was about to come out of his mouth. The suspense only mounted when he hesitated, dropping his gaze.

"I…"

She sat, waiting, her heartbeat growing faster with each passing second. He mumbled something, so softly and incoherently that she furrowed her eyebrows, her nervousness fading into confusion.

"What?" she asked.

Sheldon still wouldn't look at her, but he tried again.

"I… This morning…"

He trailed off and groaned, leaning forward and dropping his head into his hands, his shoulders sinking. At that point, Amy found that her confusion was now melding into a thick block of impatience.

"Just say it," she said.

_"I pleasured myself this morning,"_ Sheldon said into his hands, all in one breath.

For a split-second, Amy stopped breathing.

"What?_"_

Sheldon picked up his head, his eyes burning brightly as he looked right at her and said, loudly and almost angrily, "I pleasured myself in the shower this morning while thinking about _you! _Are you happy, now?"

He paused, exhaling harshly, and all Amy could do was stare at him in an astonished silence, while Sheldon grew even more distraught.

"I've been reduced to a sexual deviant who's a slave to his baser urges just like everyone else, and I honestly wouldn't blame you if you'll never be able to look me in the eyes ever again," he said, and with that, he tore his gaze away from her again, letting out one harsh breath after another.

Amy, in her dazed state, settled back against the chair, her own shoulders slumping. Now, _she_ was the one staring directly forward, completely spaced out. She stayed like this for a while, her body numb, her skin tingling. Suddenly, a smile broke out over her face, and she leaned forward so that she was sitting on the edge of the chair.

She took Sheldon's face in each of her hands, which startled him, but he only stared at her in confusion as she cupped his jaw. She gave him no time to react as she pulled him in, kissing him flush on the mouth. To her pleasant surprise, he didn't pull away, but immediately reciprocated, moving his lips against hers in a slow rhythm. The feeling of their lips meshing together, coupled with the soft moan from Sheldon that vibrated against Amy's lips, caused her whole body to throb with desire.

As they broke apart, her hands slipped away, and she slumped against the chair, completely out of breath. Sheldon did the same, looking more dazed than she'd ever seen him before.

"That…was not at_ all _the reaction I was expecting," he said, trying to regain his breath. "Although…I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it."

Their eyes met, and now, they both smiled, a hint of flirtation in each of them. Whether it was the endorphins from the kiss, or simply from Sheldon's confession, Amy found herself feeling bold enough to admit her own little secret to him.

"I pleasured myself last night," she said.

Sheldon's eyebrows shot up at that. "You did?"

Amy nodded, a sheepish smile adorning her glowing face, while Sheldon swallowed, looking uncomfortable. He suddenly brought his knees together, and Amy couldn't stop herself from dropping her eyes to stare.

"Amy, I…"

She looked back up, and he hesitated again.

"I'm…still not ready for coitus," he said, voice so soft it was practically a whisper.

"That's okay, Sheldon," she said, her voice just as tender. "If I'm being completely honest, I…" She took a breath. "I'm not…fully ready, either."

"Really?" Sheldon asked in surprise, and she could feel herself smiling again, because there was something so plainly adorable about his innocent approach to such a deeply intimate subject.

"Mentally, I'm just…not even close to being ready," Amy said. "In fact, I'm a little scared."

"I'm relieved to hear you say that, because I'm downright terrified," Sheldon said. "I'm certainly not ready to be…nude in front of you."

Amy involuntarily raised her eyebrows at that, her cheeks warming again. She shivered with delight, grinning even wider. Sometimes she forgot how similar she and Sheldon truly were. She loved how open and honest they were being with one another right now. It filled her with a freeing sense of vulnerability that she knew he felt, too._  
_

"You know, Sheldon," she said, the spike of heat fueling her, making her feel more confident. "While we may not be ready for actual sex yet, there might be a way for us to…experiment a bit, provided that you'd be open to it, of course."

Sheldon sat up, looking intrigued. "What would be the parameters of this experiment?"

"It would be…hypothetical coitus," Amy said. "A way to stimulate one another that would require absolutely no shedding of any clothing."

Now, Sheldon's eyes sparked with undeniable interest as he simply said, "Go on."


	3. Experimentation

There was a nervous energy buzzing in the air, fluttering between the two of them, but that was to be expected. This was, after all, their first time. Figuratively speaking, but nevertheless.

The rules of the experiment were firm, but reasonable, and after discussing them at length and reaching a verbal agreement, Sheldon had proposed to conduct the experiment in his bedroom, as he'd explained that it would not only give them the necessary privacy, but decrease the likely possibility of being interrupted should Leonard return home. Amy had easily agreed to this, praising him for his sensibility, and now, they both sat on Sheldon's bed, facing one another, sitting closely, though not close enough that there were any body parts touching.

At least, not _yet._

They were both waiting for each other to make the first move. Their eyes were locked, as though they were having an intense staring contest, and Amy's skin tickled with anticipation. This entire scenario screamed familiarity, as she was reminded of the last time they'd sat like this, over a year ago, when they engaged in metaphorical sex in the realm of Dungeons and Dragons. That experience had been a small, glimmering look into the world of physical intimacy Amy so desperately craved, and when she thought about how far they'd come in their relationship since then, it made her head spin, in a good way.

"Are you ever going to start?" Amy asked, unable to wait any longer.

"I don't see why _I_ have to be the one to initiate," Sheldon said in a petulant tone.

There were times when Amy found his childlike behavior endearing, as he could be so unbelievably naïve and clueless on so many things despite being an absolute genius when it came to most everything else. However, in this moment, she did not find his behavior even remotely endearing. In fact, right now, she found his stubborn attitude nothing short of infuriating, and she expressed her frustration with a loud sigh and a deliberate rolling of her eyes.

"Fine," she said, _"I__'ll_ start."

She lifted her hand, only to freeze, suddenly feeling shy and hesitant. This was really about to happen. They were really going to do this. Sheldon sat perfectly still, which only made her feel even more nervous, because she knew he was waiting for her to touch him. He was ready.

With a jolt of determination striking her, Amy reached out to him. His eyes followed her hand as she settled on her target by gingerly touching his chest. Her fingers carefully spread across his left pectoral, directly above his heart. She let out a quivering breath that she hadn't realized she'd been holding in, and she took a moment to simply admire his chest, lean, yet solid. Remarkable.

She looked up into his eyes, and there she held her gaze, expecting him to recoil. They stared at one another for a beat, and then another, and another. It was intense and overwhelming, making Amy feel warm, too warm, and, as a result, she found herself unable to speak, and she had to look away.

_Come on, Fowler. He's waiting._

And yet, nothing.

"I kiss you," Sheldon said out of nowhere.

Amy's eyes jumped back up to meet his eyes, the fear instantaneously draining from her system. He had a serious look on his face, while she felt a sly smirk tick up at one corner of her mouth. He really was ready.

And now, so was she.

"Where?" she asked daringly.

Sheldon's confidence wavered, his eyes bulging.

_"Where?"_ he repeated in surprise.

Amy bit her lip, taming the mischievous little smirk of hers, while Sheldon's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, his gaze shifting from her face as he pondered for a moment, until he looked at her straight on again and gave her a matching devious smirk of his own.

"Your neck."

"Oh," Amy said, a thrilling shiver racing down her spine, her smile widening. "Okay. Continue."

"Very well," Sheldon said, "but, as per the rules, you'll need to let go, since it's now my turn."

She did, allowing her hand to fall away and come down to rest in her lap. Sheldon leaned in closer to her, and she felt a fire ignite, sweeping through her body.

_Yes. Touch me, Sheldon._

His hand settled on top of her knee, and Amy found herself wishing more than anything that she wasn't wearing tights, so that she could feel his warm hand directly on her skin. Still, she closed her eyes, shuddering from the contact, a sweet sigh leaving her lips.

"I graze my mouth along your neck, sucking gently," Sheldon said.

Amy moaned her approval, her smile stretching farther to one side of her face. "That feels amazing," she said, basking in the warm, powerful glow of her fantasies. Her skin tickled, heating up, as though she truly could feel the warmth of his mouth on her neck. "What about your hands?"

"My hands…reach out to lovingly caress your…breasts," Sheldon said. "I squeeze them softly while kneading them in my palms."

"Oh,_ my,"_ Amy said, beginning to lose sight of herself, melting into Sheldon's imaginary touch, while, in reality, he gave her knee a small squeeze. This experiment was turning out to be so much better than she imagined. She needed more. "I…" Her eyes popped open. "I believe it's my turn now," she said with an eager grin sprawling across her face.

Obligingly, Sheldon released her knee and settled both of his hands in his lap. Amy took a moment to freely rake her eyes over his body in a full sweeping motion. She noticed the way Sheldon squirmed slightly, clearly affected by her gaze, and she smirked in a way that was both intimidating yet promising. Finally, she brought up her hand and, once again, rested her palm over his chest.

"As I roam my hands down your…magnificent chest," Amy said, pausing a moment, becoming distracted. Her hand flexed against his chest, fingers clenching, the heel of her palm nudging against his racing heart. "I kiss you deeply…on the lips."

A low grunt escaped Sheldon's lips, a noise so arousing that Amy found herself wanting to go even further, and so, she began sliding her hand down his chest, grazing across his abdomen, running lower, and lower, and—

"No bathing suit areas," Sheldon said in a stern, albeit noticeably shaky voice.

"I'm never one to break the rules, Dr. Cooper," Amy said, her eyes glinting with mirth as she settled her hand just above his belt. She let her words do the rest. "I dip my hand below your waist and firmly grasp your—manhood."

"Oh, dear Lord," Sheldon said, the closest he'd ever come to uttering passion-induced profanity. His body writhed beneath Amy's touch.

She smirked. "I give you a slow, tantalizing stroke, feeling you grow in my palm."

Sheldon made another noise, a trembling whimper. His eyes were closed, and his tongue darted out as he swallowed.

Amy's heart pounded.

_"Oh-_kay," he said, voice cracking. He cleared his throat and opened his eyes. "Yes. Um. My turn."

Her hand slipped off his body, while he brought his hand up, and this time, he gently touched her cheek. It was the first skin-to-skin contact of the experiment, and Amy couldn't stop the quivering breath that left her mouth. She closed her eyes and listened to the sweet sound of Sheldon's voice as he stimulated her with his words.

"I…gently lie you down on the bed, and…lie myself down…on top of you."

Amy's back arched involuntarily, her head tipping up as she breathed out again. Suddenly, her eyes popped open, locking with her boyfriend's darkened gaze.

"Are you…wearing protection?" she asked.

His eyebrows briefly came together. "Protection? For metaphorical coitus?"

She said nothing, only stared, her ragged breathing the only sound in the otherwise painfully quiet room.

"Of course," Sheldon said after a beat.

Amy relaxed into another grin. "Okay," she said. "Perfect. My turn again."

His hand slid down her cheek, fingers grazing her jaw, before slipping off entirely. She grinned wider as she brought up both hands, cupping either side of his face. His pale cheeks were hot to the touch. He swallowed again, eyes drifting closed.

"I…" She swallowed heavily. "…wrap my arms around your shoulders and…kiss you harder than I've ever kissed you before."

Now, Sheldon brought up both of his hands, grasping Amy's shoulders.

"I…kiss you back full force, and then I…pull away and…look adoringly into your beautiful eyes as I…enter you," Sheldon said.

_I can't breathe, _Amy thought, her heart pounding so hard she felt her pulse throbbing throughout her whole body. The experiment was taking on a life of its own. She let her hands slide down his face, over his neck, back to his chest, fingers curving against the soft material of his t-shirt. Sheldon didn't let go of her, but instead, gripped her shoulders harder. They were no longer abiding by the rules, but now was certainly not the time to tell him to let go.

"I…arch against your body and moan loudly," Amy said.

"And I…" Sheldon paused. His voice sounded deep and grainy. "…begin thrusting inside you, slowly and deeply."

_Yes. Don't stop._

"I meet your thrusts and throw my hands over your back, pressing our heated bodies together to create a sensual friction," Amy said.

"I…increase my speed as I lean down and kiss you so passionately it takes your breath away," Sheldon said, his hands sliding down her arms.

_Oh, yes, _she thought as another shiver rippled through her body.

"I writhe against you," she said, "only to break the kiss as my body mounts with pleasure."

"I whisper in your ear to climax for me, Amy."

"I do," Amy whispered, body quivering.

"And I climax as well, experiencing the greatest pleasure I've ever felt in my life," Sheldon said.

"And, after it's over, I wrap my arms around you, enjoying the sound of our breaths mingling as I give you a soft kiss on the lips," Amy said.

They both fell silent. Amy's hands slipped off of Sheldon's body, one lying flat on top of his comforter, the other balled up in her lap. Sheldon's hands slipped away as well, and, when Amy felt his hand touch hers, she gasped softly, her eyes flying open.

She dropped her gaze to stare down at Sheldon's hand, resting comfortably on top of hers, and this physical contact alone, something so simple and innocent, was so much more intimate to her than anything they'd said to each other throughout this entire experiment of theirs. She didn't dare move her hand, or even comment on the fact, in fear that by drawing attention to it, he would break and move his hand away.

"Was that…satisfying for you?" Sheldon asked, and there was something new in his voice that she'd never heard before, something deep, gravelly. Husky.

"Immensely satisfying," Amy whispered. "Was it…satisfying for you?"

There was a pause. She looked up at him again. His eyes shined with longing as he answered her, not verbally, but with a small nod of his head. He inched his head towards her, his eyes falling shut again. Amy closed her eyes as well, and she held her breath as she felt the delicate pressure of Sheldon's soft lips touching her own. She relaxed into it, a sigh escaping her mouth as Sheldon's lips grazed hers for only a few moments, before pulling away.

Amy didn't move. Sheldon didn't move. She opened her eyes, taking in the mesmerizing, fiery look in his eyes. He leaned in again, and this time, when their lips connected, it was deeper, harder. Amy tilted her head up to better meet his lips, and then, she felt something completely different that had her heartbeat fluttering wildly.

Sheldon parted his lips, the warmth of his mouth flooding through her, making her weaker, and she responded by opening her mouth as well. She felt his tongue as it licked her bottom lip, slowly, tickling her a little, before it slipped inside. When his tongue met hers for the first time, Amy instantly let out a moan that she simply could not control. It was low, but Sheldon seemed to respond well to it, as she felt his hands, warm and strong, come up to grasp her face.

Out of reflex, Amy brought up her own hands and tightly gripped his shoulders. Her thoughts spiraled as the fire in her body grew larger, powerful tingles shooting up and down her limbs, her heart pounding in excitement. It was a strange sensation, with their wet tongues tangling together, moving back and forth inside Amy's mouth, but the heat between them only skyrocketed, and she was loving every second of it.

Sheldon abruptly broke the kiss, breathing out really hard, and Amy crashed to reality. She let go of him, while his hands slipped from her face, and as she panted, she could only stare at him, noting how his swollen lips were slick with saliva._ Is that his saliva, or mine?_ She unconsciously drew her own lips together, bringing up a hand and running it through her hair, before she rose from her spot on the bed.

"I should probably head home now," she said. "Will you walk me out?"

"Yes," Sheldon said. "Of course. I just…I'm going to need a moment."

She stared at him, taking in the way his chest rose and sank as he sharply breathed in and out. She also took in his reddened ears, the look of obvious discomfort on his face, the way he was purposely avoiding her eyes, and finally, the way his hands drew to his body, strategically cupping the growing bulge in his pants. She didn't want to embarrass him, but at the same time, she knew she needed to help him out.

"Think of Howard's mother wearing nothing but an ill-fitting, two-piece bathing suit," Amy said.

Sheldon froze. His chest fully sank with a slow, relaxing breath, and he looked down for a moment, before finally looking up at her.

"Wow," he said, standing up at last. "That worked like a charm."

Amy grinned.

* * *

Leonard and Penny were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when Sheldon and Amy emerged from his bedroom. Amy walked out first, and Sheldon followed her, both walking calmly and suppressing lustful smiles. Neither one of them acknowledged Leonard or Penny, whose eyes followed them as they made their way across the room.

When they reached the door, Sheldon and Amy turned to each other, and now, they were both grinning widely, their faces bright with plain and utter happiness.

"Goodnight," Amy said.

"Goodnight," Sheldon said.

Their eyes lingered on each other as Leonard and Penny watched them. Suddenly, Sheldon turned his head to glance at the two of them, an irritable look crossing his face, and Penny snapped her eyes away, pretending to stare at the TV, leaving Leonard to do the same.

As soon as Sheldon turned back to Amy, however, Penny looked at them again, needing to catch every second. Sheldon leaned down, giving Amy a kiss on the lips, and Penny's mouth fell open.

"What is happening?" she whispered to Leonard, who seemed far less interested in watching Sheldon and Amy lock lips.

When they broke away, Amy's eyes were shining even brighter than before. She left, but even after the door closed behind her, Sheldon stood there in a daze, while Leonard finally spoke up.

"Hey, Sheldon, what were you and Amy doing in your roo—"

A twisting grip on his arm had Leonard's question morphing into a pained wail.

_"Ow," _he said as Penny squeezed his arm with unbearable strength. "What the hell?"

He turned to his fiancée, but she wasn't paying attention to him. Her eyes were on Sheldon, who finally turned from the door and made his way back across the room, his hands slipping behind his back and that small, secretive smile still on his face.

"Shh," Penny said. "He's having a _moment."_

It wasn't until Sheldon reached the kitchen that he stopped, and the smile dropped from his face. He looked from the counter, to Leonard and Penny.

"Which one of you left the milk out?" he asked.

Penny's grip tightened. "Okay, the moment's over, the moment's over," she said in a rushed breath, giving Leonard a pleading look.

He sat up, letting out a sigh. "Uhhh. I did. I made Penny coffee and forgot to put the milk back in the fridge."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes, a perturbed look on his face, an expression he held as he picked up the carton of milk and opened the refrigerator.

"In that case, on behalf of Penny…" He paused, and, after placing the carton inside and swinging the refrigerator door shut, he pointed to Leonard and said, "You've just lost sex tonight."

_"What?"_ Leonard said. "You can't do that. He can't do that. Right?"

He looked at Penny, who was now smiling in absolute amusement, and she merely gave him a shrug.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take a shower," Sheldon said, which only deepened Leonard's confusion.

"Wait, what? Two showers in one day? What gives, Sheldon?" Leonard asked. "Was that abnormally long shower you took this morning not enough for you?"

"Evidently, no, it wasn't, but I've said too much already, Leonard," Sheldon said, heading down the hallway.

They heard a door close and the water turn on, and Leonard and Penny shared an apprehensive look.

"Should we—"

"Yes," Leonard said, and they got up and headed to Penny's apartment without another word.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed the additional chapters. I certainly enjoyed writing them. Please share your thoughts in a review. :)


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